Evolving Porto Alegre

Porto Alegre like all the world´s cities is a ragbag of the great and the dire. I love living here quite like I love Lemmy from Motorhead, warts´n´all, but there´s room for improvement. Much smaller than London it offers many things we Londoners don’t have and we can learn from the way of life here as no doubt Alegrenses learn from our gross and gourdy metropolis. Obviously the first thing that should change in Brazil is the huge gulf between rich and poor which leads to crime and destitution the world over, but apart from that here is my list of things I think PoA could do with and without…

Do with:

garam masala - bring your own or see if you can find it in the public market!

Curry: If an Alegrense says they like spicy food they´re telling black lies, there isn´t one good Indian restaurant in the whole town. Not one. Where are the nosebleed vindaloos? Can I even get an authentic chicken tikka masala? Visitors, bring your own gram masala and colman´s mustard with you. See also branston pickle and cheddar cheese!

Bus timetables – Bus shelters, half-pipes of corrugated iron, line the streets but you learn more about jesus and strip joints than you do the times and destinations of the sadly characterless buses. Import those retro buses from Argentina, they´re far more exotic, and put up timetables.

where are we going?

Cycle lanes – When I first arrived here in 2011, a manifestation by cyclists for better facilities and safer roads made world headlines when a maniac plowed into it with his car. Fortunately no one was killed. Since then there still aren´t cycle paths on the road and motorists are as selfish as ever. Why not go green and replace the lane slaloming taxis with rickshaws or make them solar powered with max speeds of 20mph?

Monkeys – I don´t get why anyone would be proud that Porto Alegre doesn´t have monkeys and think us foreigners ignorant or rude for expecting them. Since when was having cute little monkeys a bad thing? The mata atlantica used to belong to them, species like the blond capuchins are all endangered now so reintroduce them, it´s not like you don´t have enough trees.

More saliva – I love sharing a chimarrão with strangers but why not share ice lollies and cutlery as well?

Others: sound time-keeping, cheaper dvds and snow at Christmas

Things PoA can do without:

Giselle Bundchen – If you blindfolded a newcomer to Brazil and took them from Salgado Filho airport to the centro historico, the shock of so many ugly people would make them think they´d entered the twilight zone by mistake. Porto Alegre has more than its fair share of beautiful women, enticing us ugly expats to your shores, but be honest, you have a plethora of different people of all shapes and sizes and too much body consciousness to sustain them. Be proud of everyone not just the size zeros and vacuous supermodels.

The Beatles and ACDC – Okay, they´re great, I get it. But while universidade sertanejo and Brazilian funk deservedly take the flak, the gaucho mobsession with these two bands is chatissimo (really boring). Putting your baby in an ACDC t-shirt makes ACDC less cool and makes you a moron.

This building – 

unfinished since 1956

Maniac Taxi Drivers: If you want to feel like a princess here, take a taxi. Within minutes of hurtling down the road you will feel like Princess Diana. The fast lane in Brazil is whatever lane your taxi happens to be in.

Others: rip-off internet shops, stripclub flyers all over the pavement (use blue tack) and the facebook page for estrangeiros/foreigners in Porto Alegre which is oddly unfriendly and snooty.

But what can we Londoners take from Porto Alegre?... I will blog about that soon!

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La Rouge Bistrô - Vegan Food can be Fancy (and Delicious!)

I'll be the first to admit that the idea of Strict Vegetarianism (a.k.a. Veganism) is a foreign one to me. I'm used to this Gaucho culture that surround us in Porto Alegre, with the Barbecue in the weekends included. However, the world of vegetarian food has been interesting me for the last few years, since I decided to give it a try.

This time I went with my girlfriend to a relatively new place, called the La Rouge Bistrô. It's funny to see how a Cow is in the logo, but it does make sense: they love the animals, so much that they won't harm them. The place is run by Gunter Filho and his wife Roberta Kleber, both of them used to hunt japanese boats in the Sea Shepherd and that is impressive by itself.

The menu is simple, but it offers some interesting options. I choose the Kebabs as an opening to our meal.

I'm not into the Satay Sauce (made with peanuts) but other than that it was a really good dish, I was surprised to discover that the "potato" in the end was actually a pineapple, the taste and the juice of it caught me with my hands down.

After that my girlfriend got the Tagliatelle with "meatballs" and I got the mixed-grains Risotto. The pasta and tomato sauce was very fresh and went very well with the pasta, but it was the "meatballs" that stole the show. Probably the best part of the meal, they are made with all kinds of nuts and grains, are crunchy in the outside but soft inside, you can ask for them in a separate dish, for a snack, and I couldn't recommend it more.

My dish, the Risotto, did hit the spot as well, with a lot of flavor going on, thanks to the spinach cream all over it.

If you are searching for something different to eat, or are a Vegan looking for somewhere to go in this city of "Churrascarias", this is a great option. They have a website and a FanPage where you can discover more about the menu and what they can offer to you.

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And if you still have room, how about a Feijoada?

Maris took us through her impressions of the Gaucho churrasco. My introduction to Brazilian cuisine was in London many years ago, when I first met my husband. He is half-English, and he was spending his early 20s in the vibrant UK capital, having a wild time and experiencing life outside of Rio Grande do Sul.

His big sister lived there also, and on Sundays we would make our way across the river for some family time and a feast like I had never seen before. The smell in her flat was incredible. ‘What IS it??’ I cried, when I first opened the pot and saw the velvetly black beans and chunks of meat and sausage. Her English boyfriend proudly told me that it had been cooking all day and I was in for a treat. He was so right.

They explained the ritual. The rice, the greens, the farofa, the oranges. Oranges? Why oranges? Apparently the vitamin C complements the iron…or something like that…but mainly because it just tastes good. I was in heaven. And of course I ate WAY too much… I think I could actually feel each one of those beans expanding in my stomach for the rest of the day!

Churrasco may be the pride of RS, but I think feijoada is the unofficial Brazilian dish. I’ve been told that it was traditionally a slave meal. Random discarded bits of the pig—ears, tail, snout, etc-- were cooked all day to produce the delicious stew, but it also may have originated from the Portuguese cozidos.

I joke that the main reason I agreed to come and live here was for the feijoada alone! When I lived in Australia it was difficult to get black beans, and I went a little crazy having them here in Porto Alegre when I first arrived. But now I skip them when I go to the buffets. I want to make sure that when I have the opportunity to tuck into a real home-cooked feijoada, I am ready to savour every mouthful.

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Churrasco – the Gaucho equivalent for Estonian sauna

Churrasco is the Portuguese term for barbeque. Here in the south of Brazil, it is deeply traditional. It is not a meal; it is a process and a ritual.

I believe anyone organizing a party, a get together or a welcome/goodbye for someone would first suggest having a churrasco. Just like in Estonia, where we would organize a sauna party (I have to admit, I am from Saaremaa - an island far from the capital). Learn more about the ritual and meaning of sauna before continuing with reading this post. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finnish_sauna (Estonian sauna tradition is 100% the same).

Both sauna and churrasco are the main family event of the week.

So what does a real churrasco look like?

We have to start by looking deep into Gaucho soul and asking ourselves – what is the perfect state of relaxation, understanding of the best spent quality time, and the image of true manliness for Gauchos?

A Gaucho is very proud of Rio Grande do Sul and its traditions. He, like an Estonian man, finds it important to be able to start a fire, which is a lost value in the western world. The highlight of his weekly accomplishments in his true heart is when he serves his dearest people perfectly juicy, just enough salty meat that he made himself, from scratch. Traditionally that would include killing the cow with his own sword, but nowadays, in the city, the tradition mainly starts at the butcher’s by choosing the right kind of pieces of meat.

In the case of sauna, the whole procedure starts with chopping firewood. It is important that the wood comes from the right kind of tree and it is completely dry. Then the man can proceed with chopping the logs, placing them in the sauna oven and setting the whole thing on fire.

The meat (according to the piece) is rolled around and then kept a few minutes up until some tens of minutes in coarse salt. Then it is put in the churrasqueira (kind of like a big fireplace) where it is turned every few minutes. A bit later the chef will use his sword (that he keeps on his belt) to spank the salt off the meat. When it’s ready, he serves the meat on people’s plates right off the metal stick, cutting slices with his manly sword. He is the last one to eat, when everyone else is satisfied.















He serves different pieces of meat, but I find it most important to mention picanha (I believe it is located somewhere on the 'ass' of the cow) and chicken hearts (coração de galinha). The hearts because they were a part of my culture shock and because I’ve learned to think they are absolutely delicious!

Returning to the topic of sauna... The man will spend hours adding firewood, measuring the temperature, setting the hot room ready for visitors. When the temperature is right (depending on taste, between 80 and 110 degrees), he invites his friends and family to join him for a night of sauna.

Both rituals take hours and are not taken lightly. But somehow, they are rituals of relaxation and confirmation that everything is all right – the family is together, the bellies are fed/cleaned and the man of the house is still the man of the house. Complete mental and physical relaxation. Every Sunday (sauna’s case - Saturday) the family becomes closer together. It is something that kids run back home for once they’ve grown up and are leading their modern stressful lives.

My Gaucho friend agreed, he said “I would say churrasco is the reason to survive the week - to wake up, go to school/work, because after a long week - there is the churrasco.”

That is how I feel about sauna.

Just for fun, here is a little comparison between the two:

CHURRASCO	SAUNA
It’s a family-friends event	It’s a family-friends event
It feels completely natural and essential in a weekend	It feels completely natural and essential in a weekend
There is a special place in your house only for that	There is a special place in your house only for that
The ritual revolves around a fireplace	The ritual revolves around a fireplace
It takes the whole morning and noon	It takes the whole evening
Normally on Sunday	Normally on Saturday
It’s on fire	It’s hot
There is a set of special tools	There is a set of special tools
You wear traditional gaucho clothes	You wear traditionally nothing
You enjoy it with beer	You enjoy it with beer

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What's cookin'?

Porto Alegre has some great food. It does. In fact, a friend said the food here is among the best she's EVER had. I certainly wouldn't go that far, but I have had some fine meals, particularly some 'caseira', or home-style, lunches cooked by other people's maids, or the bounty of dishes served at the amazing buffets around the city.

But, and this is a BIG but in my life as a self-proclaimed foodie, what I haven't had enough of—in the five months I've been living here--are great meals cooked by my own capable hands. And this is making me crazy. Because I love to cook. I love to eat too, obviously, but I also love to prepare meals, try out new recipes, enjoy restaurant-quality dishes at home. I love the yummy satisfaction that I can do it as well as they can.

And the reason for this gaping hole in my current culinary existence lies in what Porto Alegre DOESN'T have—and that is a workable array of key ingredients. Sure, you can get twenty types of shoyu at Zaffari, or you can pick up some packets of spices and a bulk bag of grains at the mercado público, but what about those other essentials of global cuisine? Where are the corn tortillas, the tangy salsas, the refreshing sour cream, the staples of Tex-Mex food? You're lucky to find fresh coriander when you need it.

I spent twelve years in Australia, where the influence of Asian cooking is seen on every menu, in every corner store, at every farmer's market—gorgeous zesty lemongrass, salty fish sauce, nutty satay, a hundred different noodles (and I don't mean types of pasta) and my own favourite, the treacle-thick kecap manis, the sweet soy from Indonesia. Even in the smallest cities you have access to ingredients for Japanese, Thai, Vietnamese, Malaysian, Chinese food.

Before Australia I lived in England, so don't even get me started on Indian cuisine. My mouth waters for a great curry, but that is one style of cooking I usually leave to the experts. I was disappointed by a local take-out service, so I decided to make it myself. Curry pastes would be an easy way to start, but they are nowhere to be seen. Ok, with a mortar and pestle, I'll just buy the spices and get started. Cumin—love it, easy to find, good for Moroccan food too. We're on our way. Whole cumin seeds? Harder, but not impossible. Coriander seeds? Fenugreek? Search around the market and we're getting there slowly. Turmeric? Now we've hit the wall. That looks like it MIGHT be it—after all, it's pretty distinctive—but not even my translator husband knows what 'circuma' is, and neither do the people selling it.

I could go on, but you get the idea. And you're probably getting hungry too. I know I am. It's midday, so it must be time to head to the buffet, with the scores of office workers, locals, parents, kids, and me. I may not be able to cook what I want, but I certainly won't go hungry.


You might also like:

• Let's go shopping! (Supermrkets in Porto Alegre).
• The Afiador (An ancient art in the city).
• You can't get there from here (Problems moving in POA).
• Park it here (Parking your car in Porto Alegre).

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